Dick Quote #810
Quote from Dick in The Physics of Being Dick
Jonesy: But you got no proof. Besides, I couldn't jump that fence. It's physically impossible.
Dick: [enters] Physically impossible? That's where you're wrong. You may not have much respect for the law, Jonesy, but there's one law that you can't break: Coulomb's Third Law of Universal G
Jonesy: What?
Dick: It states that the force between two objects is proportional to the algebraic products of their respective charges, as well as proportional to the inverse square of the distance between them! But of course, you knew that, didn't you, Jonesy?
Jonesy: Not- Not all of it.
Dick: You're object X, and the fence is object Y. Now, where V is the velocity of the 2 objects, and R is the distance between them, and E is a unit vector directed from the first object to the second, we see that the fence proved little challenge.
Jonesy: Well... I guess.
Dick: You guess! I bet you guess. And so we see that X equals zero as Y approaches infinity! That's how you avoided the security camera. That's how you managed to get back over the fence. That's how they found you exactly 1.3 miles from the crime scene, proving that you and only you could have perpetrated this heinous crime! There's the proof!
Jonesy: Okay! Okay! Okay! You got me! I did it! I did it! My god! What kind of a cop are you?
Dick: I'm not a cop! I'm a physics professor!
3rd Rock from the Sun Quotes
‘The Physics of Being Dick’ Quotes
Quote from Nina
Nina: Look, Sally, if you're gonna work for Dr. Albright, there are a couple of things you need to understand. One: she doesn't like to be corrected when she's wrong. And two: she's often wrong.
Sally: Wait, wait. So I shouldn't tell her her breath smells like a sock full of horseradish?
Nina: I didn't.
Quote from Sally
Sally: I found a mistake in your speech.
Mary: Oh. Okay. Let's hear it.
Sally: Okay. This is so great. Okay. Here on page 2, you say there aren't any Aymaran communities on the high plains, but Dirkson's survey says there are.
Mary: No, there aren't.
Sally: Yeah, but Dirkson says there are.
Mary: All right. Maybe there's one or two, but my point still stands.
Sally: No. Okay, but Dirkson says-
Mary: Forget Dirkson! Just go back there and concentrate on- on place names and spellings and things like that. Okay? [exits]
Sally: Man, who died and made her Dirkson?
Quote from Dick
Dick: Morning, class, I'm sorry I'm so late. A funny thing happened today. I learned that there is a, uh... A small group of people that doesn't find physics absolutely exhilarating. Isn't that hilarious? [silence] [students let out a slight chuckle] Exactly. So I was wondering, what drove you to take it?
Bug: Well, uh, it's required.
Pitman: And we want to graduate.
Dick: So that's all that brings you back to my class, a requirement? Not one of you yearns for a career in physics? [Leon raises his hand] Not one soul longs to make physics his lifework? [Leon waves his hand] Not one among you aspires to place physics--
Leon: Dr. Solomon.
Dick: Leon, please, tell me you have to pee.