Frankie: So, what did you wanna show me?
Mike: Buckle up.
Frankie: What? Mike. Wait, what are you doing?
Mike: It's our almost-18th anniversary. I am taking you to French Lick and buying you a carpet remnant.
Frankie: Mike. Okay, look, stop. No, you can't just do this. This is crazy. I don't even have my phone. And what about the kids? And Aunt Ginny and Aunt Edie?
Mike: Took care of it. [both laugh and cheer]
Frankie: [v.o.] Turns out, after all these years, Mike's a genius.
[Axl, Sue, Brick, Aunt Edie, Aunt Ginny and Doris sit in the front of the Hecks' TV:]
Bob: Okay, time to turn off the TV and have a little family conversation. So, who watched last week's Wife Swap? All right, I'll tell you all about it. So there's this couple...
Frankie: [v.o.] Mike was able to get Bob to give up his "bag in the wind" lifestyle and have a family for one night.
Bob: Again, I'm not trying to hurt you, I'm trying to tell you about the best episode. I love it.