Michael Quote #325
Quote from Michael in You've Changed, Man
Michael: No, Mindy's house. Eleanor always thought there should be a Medium Place for people who led medium lives. That's the answer. We make the Medium Place a third option.
Eleanor: Of course. Maybe if you score negative points on Earth. "Sorry, you blew it. Enjoy having your penis flattened." Over a million or whatever, party time. And everyone else in between gets their own, personal Cincinnati.
Chidi: It's definitely less cruel than the current system, but it's not great.
Michael: Well, it might be the best we can do given the circumstances. Let's try to sell it to the brass.
The Good Place Quotes
‘You've Changed, Man’ Quotes
Quote from Jason
Jason: Tell me about it. I once went to jail for a week just because I stole a hot dog. Well, a hot-dog-shaped car. I stole the Wienermobile.
Quote from Tahani
Eleanor: Now all we have to do is convince Shawn.
Tahani: I'll take the lead. If I can convince Dr. Ruth not to sue Bruno Mars over songwriting credit on "Uptown Funk," I can handle this.
Eleanor: Okay, you gotta tell me that story on the way.
Quote from Judge
Judge: Ugh. All Janet voids are nothing, but Neutral Janet voids are, like, the most nothing.
Janet: Judge, please, please don't cancel Earth.
Judge: Why not? The system's broken. You guys proved it. I just want to reboot the whole thing, and go back to my chambers. I am on season three of Justified, and can I just tell you, it is so good. I, like, binged all of season two in a day.
Janet: Think of all the amazing human achievement you'd be eliminating. The works of William Shakespeare. The Pyramids. Timothy Olyphant.
Judge: Ooh, that one stings. There's, like, 50 gallons of man in a 10-gallon hat. I'm, like, oh! Look, I'm the freaking Judge, and I made a freaking ruling, and it's gonna freaking happen, soon as I find the freaking clicker thing. All right, what do I search for? "Humanity eraser button garage door opener thingy Judge." [groans]