Trevor Quote #5
Quote from Trevor in ...Someone Like Me as a Member
Chidi: So how did you not realize you had the wrong Eleanor?
Michael: Oh, we don't know what people look like... only names and profiles. On Earth, they're just dots on a map.
Trevor: Whatever, we got our wires crossed, we picked up the wrong dot, blah, blah, blah, blah blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Point is, there are two Eleanors. The nice, boring one is yours. The trash bag is ours... So, trash bag, let's go. Wh... Let's hit it. And also... I'm still waiting on that smile, gorgeous.
Michael: Trevor.
Trevor: Where's that smile?
Michael: Trevor, how about we negotiate? Maybe give you something else.
Trevor: What in the world could you have that we would want?
Michael: All right, how about a unicorn? Right? I bet you don't have one of those.
Trevor: No, that is true, yeah. [laughs] Might be fun to skin it alive, eat its raw flesh, maybe break off the horn, grind it up, snort it. Okay, let's keep talking. Yeah.
The Good Place Quotes
‘...Someone Like Me as a Member’ Quotes
Quote from Tahani
Michael: Oh, Tahani, I'm so sorry. I will obviously clean all of this up.
Tahani: I don't care about the house, Michael. I'm just upset that you let them walk all over you.
Michael: I know... they're the only thing in the Universe that scares me. I know what I have to do. I just have to be... more accommodating. Offer them everything they want, give in to all of their demands, and then they'll have to respect me.
Tahani: No, you need to stand up for yourself. I'm going to tell you the same thing that I told Mark Zuckerberg right before he ousted Eduardo Saverin. "You are smart, you are capable, and the time has come to hit 'unfriend.'" I also told Mark to lose the "the". Just "Facebook." That was me.
Quote from Vicky
Eleanor: Your parents are still together, I guess.
Real Eleanor: Oh, actually, um, I... I'm not sure. I never met my birth parents. They put me in an empty fish tank and abandoned me at a train station in Bangladesh. Luckily, I was found and adopted by a very nice couple, the Shellstrops...
Trevor: Oh, thank God.
Real Eleanor: But then they died when I was four. Bird flu.
Chidi: That's awful.
Real Eleanor: Anyway, orphanage burned down, yadda yadda yadda, made my way to America, yadda yadda yadda, learned English from watching Seinfeld, put myself through law school, and here I am.
Quote from Janet
Jason: Hey, Janet. You look sad.
Janet: People keep asking me questions that I don't know the answers to.
Jason: That was my whole life on Earth. You know, it doesn't matter if you know things. All that matters is what's in your heart.
Janet: Thanks, Jianyu. I mean, it does matter if I know things, because I'm an informational delivery system, and I don't have a heart, but thanks.