Blanche Quote #1261
Jerry: No, please let me explain the way I acted last night. My wife died two years ago. I really haven't dated since then. I wanted to get back into the swing of things, so I read up on what modern women want. You know, equality, pay their own way. I guess it's all got me confused.
Blanche: Oh, Jerry. Jerry, Jerry, Jerry. Come over here. Now, let me clear up any confusion you might have. I don't want to be treated as your equal.
Jerry: You don't?
Blanche: I want to be treated a lot better than you. I mean, really. Like a goddess who likes to go bar hopping.
Quote from Blanche
Blanche: Girls, I have a question, a vital question. I want you to think long and hard before answering. Am I ugly?
Blanche: I mean, I've always thought of myself as ravishing, but is something changing? Is there- Is there, all of a sudden, something disgusting and unattractive about me?
Blanche: Now, you cut it out, you old worm woman.
Quote from Sophia
Jerry: Hi, I'm Jerry. Is Dorothy Zbornak here?
Blanche: Uh. Uh...
Sophia: I'm Dorothy Zbornak.
Rose: Sophia, you stop that. You are not Dorothy Zbornak. I'm Dorothy Zbornak.
Sophia: All right, all right, but I am a Petrillo, and I've been known to make princes and kings leave their wives and palaces and dance the bossa nova.
Jerry: Excuse me, what does that mean?
Sophia: I think it means today is placebo-pill day. I'm going to bed.
Quote from Hey, Look Me Over
Rose: Wait a minute. If you didn't sleep with any of the men in these journals, then how come it says "Bed" on the cover?
Blanche: [laughs] Oh, that doesn't say "Bed."
Rose: Right there, it does.
Blanche: Oh, silly, those are my initials. Blanche Elizabeth Devereaux.
Dorothy: Your initials spell "Bed"?
Quote from It's a Miserable Life
Blanche: Wish me luck.
Dorothy: Wait. Blanche, why should you do it?
Blanche: Because we'll have a better chance. I happen to be a wonderful orator. And two of the commissioners can verify that.
Dorothy: Blanche, "orator" means "speaker".
Blanche: Really? Oh. Well, somebody else do the talking.