Barry Quote #1484
Quote from Barry in One Exquisite Evening with Madonna
Barry: Exactly. The older sister Bee sounds like the alpha. You should steer clear.
Adam: But I really want to meet her. She's obviously important to Brea.
Barry: Then you'll have to earn her respect in the only way possible... out-Claire Claire.
Adam: Right. And that specifically means?
Barry: Crash their sisterly dinner. Wear sunglasses inside. Be in charge. Tell the waitress you'll have the usual, even if you've never been there before. Take her seat even if she's sitting in it.
Adam: And you're certain this will work?
Barry: I'm saying it, so I must be sure. Here's a pad and pen. Take notes. [Adam grabs the pad; Barry knocks it out of his hand] Alphas never take notes! Now pick it up!
Adam: Um... no?
Barry: Good. You've already learned everything I can teach you.
The Goldbergs Quotes
‘One Exquisite Evening with Madonna’ Quotes
Quote from Barry
Barry: Stop shopping immediately. I have a menagerie of items that would delight any woman.
Adam: I told you, I don't need your help.
Barry: Opposite! My intimate knowledge of ladies' needs and desires is well-established.
Adam: Is it, though?
Barry: Item one... a deadly titanium crossbow. You and your gal pal can spend a reckless evening at the junkyard shooting out windshields.
Adam: None of this sounds like you waiting in the car.
Barry: Item two... tighty whities, the gentleman's lingerie. You give her a few boudoir photos in these, she'll remember you forever.
Adam: How could she not?
Barry: I've saved the best for last. A bulk warehouse box of Bonkers Fruit Chew candies. When she smooches you to thank you, think of me.
Adam: I'm not giving her pieces of purple candy!
Barry: Whatever! Have fun dying alone with no cavities.
Quote from Beverly
Beverly: [casps] My sweet baby girl is home!
Erica: Relax, we're only here for one week.
Geoff: We have black mold.
Erica: It's really not a big deal.
Beverly: Please, my chiropractor's receptionist's nephew slept in a bedroom with black mold. Soon he was carrying his lungs around in a backpack, which he lost on an airplane, then he had to be hooked up to one of those air pumps you use to inflate pool toys. Now he lives alone in a park ranger tower, where the air is clean and the woods are lonely.
Erica: That seems scientifically accurate, but point is we're only here for one week.
Beverly: A week with my baby and baby-in-law. I'm gonna hug whoever put that black mold in your apartment.
Geoff: You already are.
Quote from Barry
Barry: Hey! I was watching that! He's an American werewolf, but in London. Think of the culture shock.