Adult Adam: [v.o.] While my sister was kicking me out, my dad was kicking back at the office, until this guy moseyed in... Formica Mike, the Formica King, my dad's local furniture-shop rival. He was gaudy, tacky, and my dad couldn't stand him.
Mike: Hello, Murray Goldberg.
Murray: What do you want?
Mike: It's not what I want. It's what I'm offering... an invitation to break bread.
Vic: I'll break a stale loaf over your head.
Murray: Vic, come on.
Vic: I'm sorry, but I will not fall victim to this man's shenanigans. Have you seen his commercials? I can't trust a man who dresses like a mattress.
Mike: Oh, you saw my spots? Listen, does it look weird when that couple's lying on top of me?
Vic: No. Narratively, it worked fine. I'm responding to the costume.