Will Quote #1631
Quote from Will in Not with My Cousin You Don't
Will: So, Derek, you know about football?
Derek: Yeah.
Carlton: Yeah, you do? Or, yeah, you don't?
Will: Are you familiar with the term "offsides"?
Derek: Oh, yeah. That's when somebody crosses the line too soon.
Carlton: Exactly.
Will: So I can see you know what I'm talking about here then, bro?
Derek: No.
Carlton: No, you do? Or, no, you don't?
Will: Carlton. Let's put it this way. You're rounding third base and you're headed for home. You're excited because you think you're about to score easy, but here's the problem. You're in a visitor's ballpark and if you do score, the angry fans might not be able to be held responsible for their actions.
Carlton: And it's bat night.
Derek: All right, are you two in trouble with a bookie or something?
More The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air Quotes
‘Not with My Cousin You Don't’ Quotes
Quote from Hilary
Ashley: Hilary, do you remember the first time you fell in love?
Hilary: Oh, this is important. Come. Come. Come. Sit. Sit. Sit. It was Lawrence Young, the most beautiful man at Bel-Air Prep. Oh! To put it simply, he was a god. He had been held back three years so he was really buff. Oh, he had the most amazing...
Ashley: Hilary. Hilary. Hilary, I get the picture.
Hilary: Oh, Ashley, are you in love?
Ashley: I think so. I feel like Derek's the one. I don't think I'll ever feel this way about anybody else.
Hilary: Oh, Ash, I am so happy for you. But long-distance relationships don't usually work out. I mean, look at the Little Mermaid. I mean, she was stuck in the sea and he was stuck on land.
Ashley: But they ended up together.
Hilary: Yeah, with the help of a lobster. You know a lobster?
Quote from Hilary
Ashley: Hilary, can I talk to you for a minute?
Hilary: Not now, Ash, my show starts in five minutes. Uh-oh. Big-sister radar. It's important, isn't it? I can tell. I have, like, a third sense about these things.
Will Smith Quotes
Quote from Papa's Got a Brand New Excuse
Will: Hey, you know what, you ain't got to do nothing, Uncle Phil. You know, it ain't like I'm still 5 years old, you know. It ain't like I'm going to be sitting up every night asking my mom: "When's Daddy coming home?" You know, who needs him? He wasn't there to teach me how to shoot my first basket, but I learned, didn't I? And I got pretty good at it too, didn't I, Uncle Phil?
Philip: Yeah, you did.
Will: Got through my first date without him, right? I learned how to drive. I learned how to shave. I learned how to fight without him. I had 14 great birthdays without him. He never even sent me a damn card. To hell with him! I didn't need him then and I don't need him now.
Philip: Will-
Will: No, you know what, Uncle Phil? I'm gonna get through college without him. I'm gonna get a great job without him. I'm going to marry me a beautiful honey, and I'm gonna have me a whole bunch of kids and I'm gonna be a better father than he ever was. And I sure as hell don't need him for that, because there ain't a damn thing he could ever teach me about how to love my kids. How come he don't want me, man?
Quote from I, Done (Part 2)
Carlton: So, Will, you haven't told me about your new place.
Will: Oh. Yeah, yeah. Uh, you know, I'm moving in soon. You know, right now they putting a Jacuzzi in and they getting the mirrors on the roof.
Carlton: So what, it's kind of a fixer-upper?
Will: Oh, no, no. No, not at all, man. Yo, this place is huge. I mean, we got floor-to-ceiling walls and wall-to-wall floors. Man, yo, it's the bomb.