Carlton Quote #403

Quote from Carlton in Love Hurts

Thug: All right, this is a stickup. Everyone on the floor! [Carlton screams] Don't anyone try to be a hero. Let's have the cash, Webster.
Carlton: Fine, take the money. But then what? Holed up in some fleabag motel waiting for the man to come and take you away. And all that's left is to walk that last long, lonely mile with the Lord's Prayer...
Will: Will you give the man the damn money?

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 ‘Love Hurts’ Quotes

Quote from Philip

Philip: Anyway, let me update this for you. Say a stranger asks you for directions. Now, you don't know where it is, but do you say that? No. You say, "Go down three blocks, make a left, you can't miss it."
Will: Yeah. I got plenty of dudes out there still looking for places.
Philip: Same guy asks a woman. Now, she doesn't know either. But she says, "I don't know." Pfft. That's the difference between men and women.
Will: Wait, wait, wait, Uncle Phil. What is it that makes men act like that?
Philip: It's testosterone, the male hormone.
Will: And women don't have testosterone?
Philip: Well, I believe they do, but theirs is dormant most of the time. Excuse me.
Will: Wait, wait. Uncle Phil, hold on. You don't know the answer to none of these questions I'm asking you, do you?
Philip: No, I guess I don't.
Will: Then why didn't you just say so?
Philip: Because I'm a man. Hmph.

Quote from Jazz

Will: So, what am I supposed to do, Jazz?
Jazz: Only one thing to do. I give you the hoodlum pages. Let's see. Counterfeiters, extortionists, car salesmen. Ah, here it is. Guys who take dives.
Will: Wait, give me this. Wait a minute, this guy will let me punch him 10 times for 40 dollars?
Jazz: Mention this ad, and he'll throw in a head butt.
Will: Okay. So dude comes down to the Peacock he kicks up a little static, I lay him down. Lisa and everybody thinks I'm a hero. Ahh. Hey, man, where'd you get this from anyway?
Jazz: I stole it.

Quote from Will

Lisa: I wonder why you don't see a lot of Black professional bowlers.
Will: Ain't no money in it. Look, how much dough could a brother make endorsing a pair of these? It'd be like, "Hi, I'm Darnell Washington, pro bowler. Whenever I'm about to roll me a 300 game, I like to do it in these. Air Ghettos."
Lisa: Will, you are so silly.
Will: Well, you know, I try.