Hilary: Look at this.
Will: "Powerful Earthquake Rattles Northern Coast."
Hilary: Oh, boo-hoo. This.
Will: "Television personality Leeza Gibbons was shocked that the woman attempting to vandalize her car was none other than rival talk-show host Hilary Banks. Banks, seen here wielding a potato..."
Hilary: Wielding? I was not wielding, I was rubbing. I rubbed that damn potato all over Leeza's car and it didn't make a scratch. At least they didn't catch me putting my keys in her exhaust pipe.