Eric: What a lesson I have learned. Can I go?
Red: Sure. Right after you smoke this entire pack of cigarettes.
Laurie: Yay, Daddy! Ooh, tear off the filters.
Eric: Dad, you can't be serious.
Red: Have I ever not been serious?
Eric: Dad, I'm telling you the truth. Okay, you have to take my word for it. I don't smoke.
Red: Your word, huh?
Eric: It's all a man has.
Kitty: Well, now that's nice.
Red: What a load of crap. Light up!