Marcus Quote #394
Quote from Marcus in Minor Crimes
Laurie: Excuse me, folks, can everyone gather up? Um, I'd like to introduce you all to someone. This is, uh, Blaine Neustadt, and he's going to be taking over for Glenn as manager.
Amy: You- You- Uh, excuse me, Neustadt? As in, like, your last name?
Laurie: Uh-huh. Yeah. Not that it's any of your business, but yes, Blaine is my son, but that has nothing to do with why he got hired here.
Marcus: Wow, you do not look old enough to be her son.
Laurie: That's an odd thing to say.
Blaine: Ah, I just want to say hey everyone! Uh, I'm so excited to be here. This is so cool to be part of this great team. Uh, mostly I am very excited to be done doing Postmates. [chuckles] Oh, my car reeks.
Superstore Quotes
‘Minor Crimes’ Quotes
Quote from Mateo
Jonah: Glenn, you're not going to go to prison, okay? It's fine. We- We just need to do about what, 12 grand worth of damage in- In the next hour.
Mateo: Oh. We have fertilizer in the garden center. We can make a bomb.
Jonah: I feel like going from embezzlement to domestic terrorism is the wrong direction.
Mateo: We could hire termites to eat the store.
Jonah: How do you hire termites?
Mateo: I don't know, with wood?
Quote from Marcus
Marcus: You got to do what's for the greater good. If you could cure cancer, but you had to blow up a bus full of children, wouldn't you do it?
Amy: I mean, I guess?
Jonah: Just take the job. You're not just doing it for you. You're doing it for all of us.
Amy: I mean, I guess I would be better than Blaine.
Jonah: Yeah.
Marcus: Hey, Amy, guess what? One of the kids on that bus had the cure. [crunch]
Justine: Twist ending.
Quote from Glenn
Glenn: And guys, I say this a lot, but we really need to wet down those raccoon droppings before we sweep.
Dry sweeping is the reason why those roundworm eggs go airborne. God, I just realized this is the last time I'm going to tell you guys to spray your droppings.
Justine: Aww.