Garrett Quote #257
Quote from Garrett in High Volume Store
Garrett: Okay, so Charles Marquard, this is your American Express Business card.
Boy: Yep.
Garrett: And you don't have an ID with you.
Boy: Left it at the office.
Garrett: You'd like to purchase an Xbox One and a pile of candy.
Boy: Yeah, you know, for the kids.
Garrett: What kinda business you in?
Boy: Oil and gas.
Garrett: Oh, you know if it was me, I might pick up a second Xbox to have one upstairs, have one downstairs.
Boy: Okay.
Garrett: You're a good dad, Mr. Marquard.
Superstore Quotes
‘High Volume Store’ Quotes
Quote from Glenn
Glenn: Turns out that when you can't pay top dollar, the surrogates you get are just a bunch of plops.
Cheyenne: Aw, I'm sure you'll find someone.
Glenn: I don't know. Sometimes I think that maybe God is trying to send me a message that people in their late 50s shouldn't conceive a child.
Quote from Kelly
Kelly: You should go with this one. It's 4K.
Man: What does 4K mean?
Kelly: Oh, um, The first K is "knowledge." And then the second K...
Mateo: 4K televisions have 8.3 megapixels. The human eye is literally incapable of appreciating a finer resolution than this.
Man: Wow. Okay, I'll take it.
Mateo: There you go.
Man: Thank you.
Kelly: It has all of the channels.
Quote from Glenn
Jeff: Any questions? [Garrett raises his hand]Garrett.
Garrett: Abnormally shaped how?
Glenn: Oh, okay, well, if a woman's uterus is normally shaped like a V, Jerusha's is kinda like a corkscrew. Kinda like a duck's. Wait, I'll... I'll draw it.
Jeff: I meant questions about the reclassification.