Glenn Quote #338

Quote from Glenn in High Volume Store

Glenn: A few last bits of housekeeping. We switched the aisle six endcap so don't be alarmed. The softball team will once again not be happening. And lastly, uh, we got word that Jerusha has an abnormally shaped uterus which will prevent her from getting pregnant. So if any of you know any women who might like to carry our baby, you know, let me know. Any questions about softball? [sighs]

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 ‘High Volume Store’ Quotes

Quote from Kelly

Kelly: You should go with this one. It's 4K.
Man: What does 4K mean?
Kelly: Oh, um, The first K is "knowledge." And then the second K...
Mateo: 4K televisions have 8.3 megapixels. The human eye is literally incapable of appreciating a finer resolution than this.
Man: Wow. Okay, I'll take it.
Mateo: There you go.
Man: Thank you.
Kelly: It has all of the channels.

Quote from Glenn

Jeff: Any questions? [Garrett raises his hand]Garrett.
Garrett: Abnormally shaped how?
Glenn: Oh, okay, well, if a woman's uterus is normally shaped like a V, Jerusha's is kinda like a corkscrew. Kinda like a duck's. Wait, I'll... I'll draw it.
Jeff: I meant questions about the reclassification.

Quote from Glenn

Glenn: Turns out that when you can't pay top dollar, the surrogates you get are just a bunch of plops.
Cheyenne: Aw, I'm sure you'll find someone.
Glenn: I don't know. Sometimes I think that maybe God is trying to send me a message that people in their late 50s shouldn't conceive a child.