Kramer Quote #1087
Quote from Kramer in The Burning
Mickey: Oh, my liver! Why did I drink all those years? Why did I look for love in a bottle?
Dr. Wexler: Mr. Kramer? You're up.
[Kramer walks in with a face as yellow as Mickey's]
Mickey: Wait a minute. You are doing gonorrhea, aren't you?
Kramer: Yeah, well, we'll see.
Student #2: So, what seems to be bothering you today, Mr. Kramer?
Kramer: [pulls a liquor bottle out] Well, I guess it started about twenty years ago when I got back from Viet Nam, and this was the only friend I had left.
Mickey: Hey, that's my cirrhosis! He's stealing my cirrhosis! [charges at Kramer] You wanna be sick? I'll make you sick.
Student #2: Cirrhosis of the liver and PCP addiction?
Seinfeld Quotes
‘The Burning’ Quotes
Quote from David Puddy
Elaine: So where do you wanna eat?
David Puddy: Feels like an Arby's night.
Elaine: Arby's. Beef and cheese and... Do you believe in God?
David Puddy: Yes.
Elaine: Oh. So, you're pretty religious?
David Puddy: That's right.
Elaine: So is it a problem that I'm not really religious?
David Puddy: Not for me.
Elaine: Why not?
David Puddy: I'm not the one going to hell.
Quote from Kramer
Student #1: And are you experiencing any discomfort?
Kramer: Just a little burning during urination.
Student #1: Okay, any other pain?
Kramer: The haunting memories of lost love. May I? [signals to Mickey] Lights?
[Mickey turns down the lights and Kramer lights a cigarette]
Kramer: Our eyes met across the crowded hat store. I, a customer, and she a coquettish haberdasher. Oh, I pursued and she withdrew. And then she pursued and I withdrew. And so we danced. I burned for her, much like the burning during urination that I would experience soon afterwards.
Student #1: Gonorrhea?!
Kramer: Gonorrhea! [applause]
Quote from Elaine
Elaine: So, you think that Puddy actually believes in something?
Jerry: It's a used car, he probably never changed the presets.
Elaine: Yes, he is lazy.
Jerry: Plus, he probably doesn't even know how to program the buttons.
Elaine: Yes, he is dumb.
Jerry: So you prefer dumb and lazy to religious?
Elaine: Dumb and lazy I understand.