Dr. Kelso Quote #397
Quote from Dr. Kelso in My Dumb Luck
Dr. Kelso: Or how patients don't appreciate their doctors anymore. Or how medical skill doesn't matter, it's all just a dumb luck.
Boon: Oh, you already said that one, sir.
Dr. Kelso: Son, my blood sugar is low, and unless you have a candy bar in that gay little napsack of yours, shut it! Or how if you get to the cafeteria past five, they're always out of pies.
Scrubs Quotes
‘My Dumb Luck’ Quotes
Quote from Dr. Kelso
Dr. Kelso: So, have you killed anyone yet?
Boon: What? No.
Dr. Kelso: Well, you will.
Boon: Super.
Dr. Kelso: It's a rite of passage for doctors. If you're lucky, it'll be a patient who's on his way out anyway. My first kill was a 19-year-old girl. She came in with severe abdominal pain. I thought it was appendicitis. Turned out, she was pregnant and didn't know it. It was ectopic and she was bleeding internally. I should have checked for that. But by the time I discovered my mistake, it was too late. Sometimes I look at this old hospital, I actually see the faces of all the patients I've lost. Booga, booga, booga!
Boon: Aah!
Dr. Kelso: [laughs] Priceless. But I do see them sometimes.
Quote from Dr. Kelso
Board Member: Well, Bob, your employees really stood by you. They pointed out to the board that-
Mr. Mandelbaum: Hey.
Board Member: Well, you run a tight ship. And actually, we'd like you to stay on.
Dr. Kelso: Girls, thank you for saving my job. The one thing I wanted was to end things on my own terms, and since you're letting me, you can shove it up your ass, Rodney. I'm out of here.
[Dr. Kelso takes the portrait of himself]
Dr. Kelso: I'm taking this with me, dammit. Thanks for everything, Ted. Sincerely.
Ted: You're welcome, sir.
Elliot: I'm wonder if he even cared about this place at all.
Boon: Yeah. He did.
Quote from Janitor
Janitor: Okay, I'll support Kelso. But in return, I want you to put me in a full body cast and take me to the airport. I'll explain later.
Carla: Why would we do that?
Janitor: Because I'm the bigger's mover/shaker in this dump. Come on.
Elliot: You handle this. And be nice.
Carla: All right. Are you familiar with the term "delusions of grandeur"?
Janitor: I believe I coined that term. Look, I'm a simple, unassuming janitor who can control people's actions with his mind. Observe. Explode! If that would have worked, it would have freaked you out. You'd have loved it! Fall. [an elderly person falls over] Hello?