Dr. Kelso Quote #181
Quote from Dr. Kelso in My Common Enemy
Dr. Kelso: I'm so sorry you lost your grandmother. Our prayers go out to you and your family.
Woman: Thank you, Doctor. That's very kind.
Dr. Kelso: That'll be seventeen hundred dollars.
Scrubs Quotes
‘My Common Enemy’ Quotes
Quote from Dr. Cox
Dr. Cox: Boy, oh boy, does it look like you pissed off the wrong guy there, crunchy. And trust me, he'll make you pay.
Dr. Molly Clock: Oh, Dr. Kelso's all bluster. Underneath it all, I bet he's a sweetheart.
Dr. Cox: No, no. Underneath it all, he is pure evil.
Dr. Molly Clock: Perry, no one's pure evil. I mean, yeah, some people have a hard outer shell, but inside, everybody has a creamy center.
Dr. Cox: There are plenty of people here on this particular planet who are hard on the outside and hard on the inside.
Dr. Molly Clock: So they'd have more of a nougaty center?
Dr. Cox: Lady, people aren't chocolates. Do you know what they are mostly? Bastards. Bastard-coated bastards with bastard filling. But I don't find them half as annoying as I find naive bobble-headed optimists who walk around vomiting sunshine.
Dr. Molly Clock: I'm touching your creamy center.
Dr. Cox: Oh, I am so very angry that I'm going to find someone to kill just to prove her wrong.
[J.D. walks up behind Dr. Cox and wisely decides to back away]
Quote from Dr. Kelso
Dr. Kelso: Oh, Dr. Clock. Uh, look, I'm afraid I wasn't being honest with you before. In my job, it seems like I'm always the bad guy. Hard as this is to admit, it gets to me sometimes. The point is, the antidepressants I asked you to prescribe weren't for my wife, they were for me.
Dr. Molly Clock: Oh, I understand. So what dosage are you on?
[flashback:]
Enid: [o.s.] Where are my Fig Newtons, Bob?!
Dr. Kelso: I'm getting them, dear!
[present:]
Dr. Kelso: About half a Newton?
Dr. Molly Clock: No dice.
Quote from Dr. Kelso
Dr. Kelso: It's a mystery. Now, our old hospital psychiatrist used to write my wife, Enid, a prescription for crazy pills. He was a dear, dear friend, but he died or moved or something, and now I need you to do the honors.
Dr. Molly Clock: Have her come in for a few sessions, I'll gladly prescribe antidepressants.
Dr. Kelso: That's going to be a problem.
Dr. Molly Clock: Why?
Dr. Kelso: She doesn't know she's taking them.