Van: Marriage is a dead institution. It hasn't worked for me. It hasn't worked for anybody in my family. But there are certain signposts you can follow. You know, to try and make the best of it. Try not to yell at each other, it's always a great idea. Don't share any money. Always sound, sound advice. Never strike each other above the shoulders. From here down. From here down for hitting.
J.D.: [v.o.] Even though it was a wedding, none of us were caught up in the romance of the moment. In fact before we knew it-
Van: Don't share cars. You'll find that it always has the other person stink on it. You can't get that stuff off your shirt, you're gonna live with it for the rest of your life. You don't want it when you're driving to work, you know?