J.D.: Elliot, can I get your advice on something my burn patient really wants to go to his high school graduation this weekend.
Elliot: Why? Mine was awful. I was the valedictorian, but instead of bringing my speech, I grabbed my mom's love letter to her pool boy. Well, I was so nervous, I ended up reading that one anyways. Apparently, I spoke a lot about "my fondness for throbbing members". Still, my closing words to my graduating class were actually kind of appropriate. Something about wanting to make sure I chased all of my dreams, before I was all old and dried up down there.