J.D.: [v.o.] As every piece of food I'd put to my body in the last year was rushing out of me, it got me thinking. The way some things never change shines a light on the things that do. Like when a new person comes into the hospital to stay.
Dr. Cox: [whistles]
Janitor: My office keys, Ted.
Elliot: Can't believe I'm actually doing this. You're meeting me out later, right?
J.D.: [v.o.] Or an old friend leaves for good. Sometimes the biggest changes are a result of an impulsive decision.
Carla: I think we should have a baby.
Turk: Whoa, whoa, whoa. I know you're feeling abandoned right now, but we just went through a really rough spot, And I'm not the type of guy to make life-changing decisions without thinking about it for at least, like, a few months. [Carla unbuttons her top] Let's make a baby.
J.D.: [v.o.] And so here I am, a guy in an empty apartment with a dead dog. Oh, and that's not a tear on my cheek. That's just from the leak in my ceiling. And, yes, change is scary, but it's also inevitable. It's up to you to make the best of it. I mean, it's not like opportunity's just gonna fall into your lap.
[A woman in her bathtub crashes through the ceiling]
J.D.: [v.o.] Then again...
J.D.: Howdy, neighbor, I'm Jonathan.
Woman: Hi.
Man: You eyeballin' my woman?
J.D.: [v.o.] I hate change.