Ron Swanson Quote #223
Quote from Ron Swanson in Ron and Tammys
Ron Swanson: [to a man] We're here to serve you, friend. I hope the rest of your day is cool beans.
Leslie Knope: Ron, what is this memo you sent to me? You're not going to the battle royale?
Ron Swanson: I have decided not to attend this year.
Leslie Knope: Okay, first of all, it's disturbing that you wrote a memo, at all. But you love arguing against government spending. Why do you not wanna do it now?
Ron Swanson: Leslie, please. The government knows what it's doing. I'm confident that I'll- [Leslie slaps Ron] Ouchie.
Leslie Knope: You and I are going to lunch. We have to talk.
Ron Swanson: Let me just call Tammy first and get permission.
Leslie Knope: Oh, come on.
Ron Swanson: [on the phone] Tammy, I was wondering if I could go to lunch with Leslie? Terrific. Bye. [hangs up] She says I can't go.
Leslie Knope: You're going to lunch with me. I say you can go.
Ron Swanson: Oh, gosh. I'm really in a pickle now.
Leslie Knope: Oh, my God.
Parks and Recreation Quotes
‘Ron and Tammys’ Quotes
Quote from Ron Swanson
Ron Swanson: So we need to find proof of every tax deduction I've taken in the last five years.
Leslie Knope: Ron, most of these aren't even receipts. This one says, "I bought supplies. 2007".
Ron Swanson: You won't find any bank statements either. I've heavily invested in gold which I've buried in several different locations around Pawnee. Or have I?
Quote from Chris
Ann: I would like to shoot a new PSA and I think it'd be good to get someone who's healthy and telegenic, and I thought that you would be perfect.
Chris: Ann Perkins. I am flattered. And I will do it. Is there a script yet?
Ann: Uh, no, because you just approved the idea, like, three seconds ago.
Chris: I would like you to write me a script and get it to me in an hour. And we should start thinking about wardrobe. Casual? Formal? Semi-formal? Sporty? Scary? Posh? Baby? Those are the Spice Girls. I just got caught up in my own thoughts. I'm very excited about this. In terms of shirts, I can wear white...
Quote from Ron Swanson
April: What's this? Some kind of lame drug deal?
Ron Swanson: That is a gentleman's agreement. I made that man a dining room table in exchange for 60 feet of copper pipe and a half pig.
Leslie Knope: Well, looks like we have some actual receipts here. Same amount, every month. 140 bucks. What's this?
Ron Swanson: Every 30 days, I buy shotgun shells and cigarettes and send them home to my mom.
Andy: [laughs] That's so sweet. Your mom sounds kick-ass.
[aside to camera:]
Ron Swanson: My first ex-wife's name is Tammy. My second ex-wife's name is Tammy. My mom's name is Tamara. She goes by Tammy.