Jerry Quote #17
Quote from Jerry in Park Safety
Jerry: This is real. I really dislocated my shoulder.
Leslie Knope: Were you even in the park yesterday?
Jerry: Look, I was on my way to feed the hummingbirds, and I stopped for a breakfast burrito.
Leslie Knope: The farting.
Jerry: Yeah. And, Lord Sheldon, he lunged at a bird, I dropped the burrito, and it lands on a log in the creek. So I go to reach for it, I lose my balance, and I fall on my shoulder really weird.
Leslie Knope: Well, why didn't you just tell everybody the truth?
Jerry: Are you kidding me? Imagine what Tom would have said.
[aside to camera:]
Leslie Knope: [as Tom] Damn, Jerry, you jumped in a creek for a burrito? What would you do for a klondike bar? Kill your wife?
Parks and Recreation Quotes
‘Park Safety’ Quotes
Quote from Jerry
April: We should just directly apply the food to your clothes. [laughter]
Leslie Knope: Yay! Making fun of Jerry's back.
[aside to camera:]
Jerry: They can laugh at me all they want. Because two more years until I retire with full benefits and pension. And my wife and I, we have bought a little cottage on a lake. And I am going to get myself a stack of mystery novels, a box of cigars, and I am going to sit back and enjoy my life.
Quote from Ann
Ann: [aside to camera] I always had fun with Andy. The problem is, when you're his girlfriend, you're also his mother and his maid and his nurse. He's completely helpless. He's like a baby in a straightjacket. Ooh, Baby in a Straightjacket. That's a good band name. I should tell him that.
Quote from Jerry
Jerry: Wait a minute. No. That is not the graph. That is a picture from my vacation in Muncie.
Tom: You went on a vacation, and you chose Muncie, Indiana?
Jerry: Yeah. My wife and I have a timeshare.
Tom: In Muncie?
Leslie Knope: Tom. Muncie is a lovely city.