Tom: This is a great idea. Fresh air, no screens. I'm getting really good at chopping wood too.
Ron Swanson: You're a regular Paul Bunyan.
Tom: Ow! I got stung by the wood! Oh, no, it's a splinter. I need to get on WebMD now! I need a iPhone or a Samsung Galaxy, something with 4G. There's no time for the edge network. What are you doing? Wha--? W-w-waa!
Ron Swanson: Got it.
Tom: I still think we should find a computer and Google "sterilization techniques."