Professor Barnes: Hello, everyone. My name is Professor Barnes. The class I'll be teaching this semester is introduction to lasers. The word "laser" stands for light amplification by stimulated emission of radiation.
Andy: Where are the lasers?
Professor Barnes: This graphic here represents the electromagnetic spectrum arranged from low frequency...
Andy: He's not even using a laser pointer.
April: He's right. This class stinks.
Ron Swanson: Stick with it. You might learn something.
Andy: Uh, excuse me. Professor? Hi, there. Andy Dwyer. Curious. When will you be bringing out the lasers for me to play with? And will we start with the small lasers, or could we go just straight to the big lasers, in terms of playing with them?
Professor Barnes: We won't be using actual lasers in this course. It's about the theory that makes them possible.
Andy: One of the most significant bummers of my lifetime.