Coach: You guys are way too messed up to be going.
Nick: You're not an expert. I am. Nobody knows we're stoned. If we didn't go, then they would know.
Coach: You're saying that be... if we don't go to the party, they're gonna think that we're high.
Nick: Oh, the guy who's never done weed. That's not the proper term. It's "smoked weed." You don't "do weed." That's a test.
Coach: You said it.
Nick: Listen to me, first order of business, we eat their food.
Coach: Okay.
Nick: Then you look at the pool. "Aw, what a great pool. I wish... I wish I could dive for rings." Because if you were stoned, you wouldn't dive for rings. Um, I was just thinking of this impression. [clicks mouth] Who am I doing? [clicks mouth] Who am I doing?
Coach: Al Pacino?
Nick: Maybe. So, then, you get home, you eat some pizza... Trust me. I just thought of every single possibility of what could happen at that party, and none of them are bad.