Schmidt: The apartment 4D no-nail oath right here: "We, the undersigned, agree never to nail our roommate Jessica Day unless the sex can be parlayed into a business that provides for all parties involved."
Jess: What?
Nick: I didn't read the fine print.
Schmidt: "If one of the undersigned nails said female, well, then all must nail her."
Jess: What?!
Nick: I didn't know there was fine print.
Jess: What, what?!
Nick: I didn't know there was fine...
Jess: Let me be very clear here ... I am a strong, self-sufficient woman, and I will not be nailing you, Schmidt, or Nick or Schmidt. Notice I said that twice because I don't feel it's sinking in. There will be no nails or screws or hammers in this building area generally, the whole thing.