Jess: Oh, you're always starting fights with everyone, Nick. I mean, not everyone's out to get you.
Nick: He had a gun, Jess! He was literally out to get me.
Jess: Isn't Nick the most negative person you've ever met?
Schmidt: Absolutely, and you know what? It all pools up right in that little satinous center below his belly button.
Winston: I mean, he's not wrong, though. His life is genuinely terrible.
Nick: You know what, Jess? I guess I don't live in a world where I smile, and people do what I want them to do.
Jess: You never smile.
Nick: A smile is a sign of weakness.