Adrian Monk Quote #1060
Quote from Adrian Monk in Mr. Monk Goes to a Fashion Show
Captain Stottlemeyer: And for the record, who did these hairs belong to?
Gordo: Pablo Ortiz.
Julian Hodge: Ortiz, isn't that the boy that's already in jail for the murder? Well, I think, gentlemen, we're finished here. Don't mind if I get back to my party.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Hang on. Hang on. Gordo, I'm sorry, but you're under arrest. Accessory to murder and falsifying evidence.
Gordo: What?
Adrian Monk: Here's what I couldn't figure out. If you were guilty, how could all the evidence point somewhere else? There could be only one possible answer. There was something wrong with the evidence.
Captain Stottlemeyer: We did some digging, Gordo. You did make a lot of money this year, but it wasn't in real estate.
Adrian Monk: Here's what happened. When you did the forensic work on the Clea Vance murder, you realized all the evidence pointed to Julian Hodge. You decided to cash in. You made Hodge an offer he was in no position to refuse. For a price, you'd bury the evidence against him. There was only one problem. You had to close the case. You needed a fall guy. Hodge remembered a young delivery boy named Pablo Ortiz, a poor kid, barely spoke any English. He was a perfect patsy. Hodge got Natasia to help him. She called the police and accused Ortiz of stalking her roommate. The police arrested Pablo. They took hair and blood samples and sent them to you. And the rest was easy. All you had to do was relabel them. Pablo never had a chance.
Gordo: You can't prove any of this.
Adrian Monk: We don't have to. You proved it for us 5 minutes ago when you swore that these hair samples belonged to Pablo Oriz.
Julian Hodge: So you planted that hair to test him.
Adrian Monk: Well, yeah.
Gordo: Whose hair was it?
Adrian Monk: It was mine. Natalie pulled it out with a tweezer. She just yanked it out.
Natalie: What was I supposed to do?
Adrian Monk: Could've cut them like I told you.
Natalie: We needed the follicles.
Adrian Monk: No, we didn't need the follicles because we knew he wasn't going to test anything. That was the whole point.
Natalie: Okay, don't be such a baby.
Adrian Monk: It's embarrassing me.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Hey, hey.
Adrian Monk: If you listened once in a while.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Hang on. Hang on!
Natalie: I am listening.
Captain Stottlemeyer: I forgot what we were doing. Oh, yeah, we're arresting you two.
Lieutenant Disher: You know the drill, Gordo.
‘Mr. Monk Goes to a Fashion Show’ Quotes
Quote from Captain Stottlemeyer
Captain Stottlemeyer: You're retiring? How old are you?
Gordo: 46.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Did you win the lottery?
Gordo: No, I've been investing. Real estate. What have you been doing with your savings?
Captain Stottlemeyer: Uh, eating. You know, I need to talk to my accountant.
Natalie: What, you have an accountant?
Captain Stottlemeyer: Nope. Gonna have to get an accountant, then I'm gonna talk to him.
Quote from Natalie
Shirt Salesman: How are you today? Do you see anything you like?
Adrian Monk: Is Dennis here? He usually takes care of me.
Shirt Salesman: Oh, no, I'm afraid Dennis quit.
Adrian Monk: He quit?
Shirt Salesman: Yeah, apparently he had one regular customer that was driving him crazy.
Natalie: Now, we're gonna be up all night wondering who that was.
Quote from Adrian Monk
Shirt Salesman: Okay, here you go. Inspected by number 8. Is there really a difference?
Adrian Monk: Are you kidding? Look at this. Look, she's an artist. Oh, I've been admiring her work for years. You know, every shirt, every stitch, every button is perfect. There's a tear. There's a tear.
Natalie: Where, where, where?
Adrian Monk: There's a tear, right there. Ah, look at this, the sleeve is all wrong. It's completely crooked.
Natalie: Well, maybe she had a bad day.
Adrian Monk: No, that's not possible. I know inspector number 8. She never lets anything get past her.
Natalie: Mr. Monk, are you okay?
Adrian Monk: Something's wrong.
Natalie: What?
Adrian Monk: Something is very wrong with inspector number 8. Dennis? Dennis?