Adrian Monk Quote #698

Quote from Adrian Monk in Mr. Monk and the Game Show

[flashback:]
Dwight Ellison: Adrian, I'm producing a new cop show in the fall. We're looking for a consultant to work with the writers, keep us honest. The position is yours if you want it.
Adrian Monk: Wow. Dwight, I don't know what to say.
Dwight Ellison: Why don't you say yes?
Trudy: Dad, that's really sweet, but Adrian would never quit his job. It's his life. Oh, you guys should see him. He is so brilliant.
Adrian Monk: Here we go.
Trudy: When he's at a crime scene, the other policemen, they just stand back and watch him work.
Adrian Monk: They watch me so they know what not to do.
Trudy: Oh, you are so modest. Besides, we love San Francisco. I really can't see us ever leaving.
Marcia Ellison: It's so far away.
Adrian Monk: Not the way Trudy drives.
Dwight Ellison: So you won't be moving back. Well, Adrian, you take care of my little girl. She's all we have.
Adrian Monk: Yes, sir. I will.

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 ‘Mr. Monk and the Game Show’ Quotes

Quote from Kevin Dorfman

Kevin Dorfman: Oh, this is looking good.
Adrian Monk: You think so?
Kevin Dorfman: Oh, it's looking fantastic. A little more mayonnaise, a pinch of paprika. Maybe two pinches. Maybe three pinches.
Adrian Monk: Okay, that's perfect.
Kevin Dorfman: Maybe four pinches.
Adrian Monk: Okay, Kevin, I think that's enough. Thank you.
Kevin Dorfman: We are going to need some pepper, and I think I have some upstairs. Maybe I should bring all my seasonings down here if we're going to be cooking all week.
Adrian Monk: All week?
Kevin Dorfman: Here's something you might find interesting. This is only the eighth time in my life I have ever had egg salad.
Adrian Monk: Really?
Kevin Dorfman: And how much do you want to bet I can name all eight? The first time was in third grade. I traded sandwiches with a kid named Stuart Kramer. Then three years after that, my cousin's confirmation party. Two years after that, I was in a restaurant. I ordered tuna fish. Do you like to laugh?
Adrian Monk: No, I don't.
Kevin Dorfman: Well, get ready to, because I knew it was egg salad. I could smell it, but the waitress kept saying to me, "No, it's tuna fish." [phone rings] Phone. We're on number three. Remember where we are.

Quote from Kevin Dorfman

Kevin Dorfman: Wow. Wow. Is that your show? Because I love that show. Who comes up with all those questions?
Dwight Ellison: Well, we have a staff of writers.
Kevin Dorfman: 'Cause I'll tell you something, that is something I've always thought I would be good at. I'm always asking people questions, and a lot of the time, they are genuinely stumped.
Adrian Monk: That's true. We are.

Quote from Kevin Dorfman

Kevin Dorfman: Mr. E., here's your coffee. Sorry it took so long. I'm still not used to that kitchen. Careful. It's hot.
Dwight Ellison: Thank you, Kevin. Oh. There's something in there.
Kevin Dorfman: That's a raisin. Yeah, I put it in to sweeten the coffee. Little trick I picked up when I was waiting tables in Aspen, Colorado, which I did for two summers. Not two consecutive summers, 'cause there was a summer in between...
Dwight Ellison: Thank you, Kevin.
Adrian Monk: Thank you, Kevin.