Kevin Dorfman: Oh, this is looking good.
Adrian Monk: You think so?
Kevin Dorfman: Oh, it's looking fantastic. A little more mayonnaise, a pinch of paprika. Maybe two pinches. Maybe three pinches.
Adrian Monk: Okay, that's perfect.
Kevin Dorfman: Maybe four pinches.
Adrian Monk: Okay, Kevin, I think that's enough. Thank you.
Kevin Dorfman: We are going to need some pepper, and I think I have some upstairs. Maybe I should bring all my seasonings down here if we're going to be cooking all week.
Adrian Monk: All week?
Kevin Dorfman: Here's something you might find interesting. This is only the eighth time in my life I have ever had egg salad.
Adrian Monk: Really?
Kevin Dorfman: And how much do you want to bet I can name all eight? The first time was in third grade. I traded sandwiches with a kid named Stuart Kramer. Then three years after that, my cousin's confirmation party. Two years after that, I was in a restaurant. I ordered tuna fish. Do you like to laugh?
Adrian Monk: No, I don't.
Kevin Dorfman: Well, get ready to, because I knew it was egg salad. I could smell it, but the waitress kept saying to me, "No, it's tuna fish." [phone rings] Phone. We're on number three. Remember where we are.