Lieutenant Disher Quote #277
Quote from Lieutenant Disher in Mr. Monk Gets Lotto Fever
Medical Examiner: Captain, if you're ready to release the body, I can take her downtown. I still don't get it. Who'd want to kill the Lotto girl?
Officer Kelton: I guess her number came up. [laughs] [Disher throws his notebook at Kelton] Hey, what are you doing?
Lieutenant Disher: Hey, what are you doing? That was my line, man.
Officer Kelton: What are you talking about?
Lieutenant Disher: I just said the exact same thing two seconds ago. Ask the captain.
Captain Stottlemeyer: Randy, this is a crime scene, for God sakes.
Lieutenant Disher: No, you heard me. You know what? He must've heard me. It's okay, look. It's written in my notebook right here. See that? "It looks like her number came up." Let's see your notebook.
Officer Kelton: I didn't write it down. I just thought of it.
Lieutenant Disher: Oh, please, come on! Can you believe this guy? You know what? I'm gonna have your badge, Officer...
Captain Stottlemeyer: Come on, Shecky, let's walk it off.
‘Mr. Monk Gets Lotto Fever’ Quotes
Quote from Lieutenant Disher
Captain Stottlemeyer: What's that? "It looks like her number came up."
Lieutenant Disher: It's a zinger. She's a lotto girl. Her number came up. Get it? You remember last year Sergeant Beecham shoved that junkie into a lamp post, and he said, "I'll keep you posted."
Captain Stottlemeyer: Oh, yeah. I heard about that.
Lieutenant Disher: Everybody heard about it. I mean, people were repeating it. It was famous. This is even better. This is a classic.
Captain Stottlemeyer: If you say so.
Lieutenant Disher: Yeah, I just need to find the right moment.
Quote from Adrian Monk
Adrian Monk: I know, but here's the thing. Tomorrow is Wednesday. Oh, we already made plans.
Natalie: What plans? Me making dinner while you vacuum the rug?
Adrian Monk: Exactly. And here's the other thing. If I let you take a night off, I have to let everybody take a night off.
Natalie: Who's everybody? What are you talking about? It's just me.
Natalie: Mr. Monk, come on. It's one night.
Adrian Monk: Well, then I'll guess I'll just have to say no... Kay. No kay. No kay.
Stan Lawrence: Which is it? "No" or "okay?"
Adrian Monk: Nokay. Nokay.
Natalie: He's trying to say okay. That's as close as he's ever gonna get.
Stan Lawrence: Nokay?
Adrian Monk: Nokay.
Quote from Adrian Monk
Adrian Monk: Or maybe I just feel insulted.
Dr. Bell: Insulted?
Adrian Monk: What I do is hard. I am out there. I am sweating out every clue. I'm putting killers behind bars. What does she do? What does she do?! [picks up calendar] 91. Number 91! 91. Number 91. I mean, how hard is that? A talking monkey could do her job. It's embarrassing.
Dr. Bell: Actually, that's 16. See, you're holding it upside down.
Adrian Monk: Oh, it's confusing. There's usually a little line under the nine.
Dr. Bell: It goes under the six. The line goes under the six.
Adrian Monk: I'm pretty sure it's the nine.
Dr. Bell: It's no big deal. I've seen it my whole life.
Adrian Monk: I've never seen it under the six.
Dr. Bell: Why don't we ask Natalie then? She's the expert.
Adrian Monk: Okay, okay.
Dr. Bell: But I see your point. About the monkey.