Natalie: Don't be mad. I know how you hate surprises, so I'm just gonna warn you. I'm gonna be surprising you.
Adrian Monk: What? When?
Natalie: In about ten seconds. This is sort of a heads-up, like a surprise alert.
Adrian Monk: Wait. You can't just burst in here and say, "surprise alert." You have to give me a little warning.
Natalie: OK, sorry. This is the surprise alert warning. This is the surprise alert. Now... surprise! I called Ambrose, and he told me this was your favorite snack. Ten round crackers, a glass of apple juice with one ice cube.
Adrian Monk: What's going on?
Natalie: And I rented this, your favorite show.
Adrian Monk: I don't have a favorite show.
Natalie: Mr. Monk, I know how important this show is to you. You can still enjoy it. You can still watch it. All right, all right, you're 12 years old. It's Tuesday night. It's 8:00. You've been waiting all week. It's Cooper Clan time. [sings] Make yourself at home with the Cooper Clan You'll never be alone with the Cooper Clan You got Billy, Janey, Cathy, and Dan Don't forget Skip
Adrian Monk: It's scamp.
Natalie: Scamp, get off that divan!