Gloria Quote #673
Gloria: Jay! Jay!
Jay: I'm up here.
Gloria: [to the heavens] Ay, Dios mío! Your time was too short!
Quote from Phil
Phil: [aside to camera] Dunphy Tower: My first commercial real-estate development. I've been dreaming of building it since I was a kid, and now it's all happening. Well, minus the trampoline park on the roof and the tunnel to my best friend's house. I am still holding out hope for a fireman's pole that takes you to the parking garage.
Quote from Jay
Jay: [aside to camera] I don't know how I got stuck. I've been on roofs since I was 14 and discovered it was the best way to see into Ethel Burkin's bedroom. Older gal. 50s, I think. Today you probably wouldn't give her a second look, but this was before the Internet. It was either that or a Sears catalog.
Quote from Come Fly with Me
Gloria: [aside to camera] I always wanted a daughter. To dress her up with pretty dresses, do her hair, her nails, her makeup. [chuckles] No one knows this, but for the first year of his life, I made up Manny like a girl and told everybody that he was my daughter. [laughs] Ay, but just for a few times. I didn't want to mess with his head. When he found the pictures, I told him that it was his twin sister who died.
Quote from Unplugged
Jay: Why didn't you just tell me this in the first place?
Gloria: Ay, like you would be okay with me stealing a dog.
Gloria: Exactly. That's why I didn't tell you. Now the dog is happy, Manny can sleep, and we have pickles.
Jay: Okay, it worked out this time, but don't forget that stealing is against the law. Now maybe in Colombia-
Gloria: Ah, here we go. Because in Colombia, we trip over goats and we kill people in the street. Do you know how offensive that is? Like we're Peruvians!