Phil: Happy - Valentine's Day, my love!
Claire: [gasps] Oh, thank you. I love this. What is it?
Phil: It's the actual porch swing where we had our first kiss.
Claire: No.
Phil: Check it out. The carvings are still on the back from 25 years ago.
Claire: Oh, my gosh. "Phil hearts Claire." Oh, honey, this is gonna look so great out on our porch. I can't believe you did this. Wow.
Phil: It was nothing. I made a few calls, drove half a day, had Campari and haggled with a handsy gay landlord, took the swing apart, loaded it in a van, ran out of gas in the desert, got harassed by a shady state trooper, and drove back with a blinding migraine. But easy-peasy.