Phil: What are you up to, buddy?
Luke: Writing a paper on President Nixon. [scoffs] What an idiot. He had it all and just threw it away because of some stupid lie.
Phil: Well, maybe it came out of his mouth before he knew what he was saying.
Luke: Okay, but then he just kept lying over and over and making it worse and worse.
Claire: Phil, how old is Angie?
Phil: Oh, uh, gosh 70. Why?
Claire: I was thinking about that house on Forsyth. It's nice but has a lot of stairs.
Phil: No. She's too fat for that.
Richard Nixon: [recording] Therefore, I shall resign the presidency effective at noon tomorrow.
Luke: If only he had told the truth.
Phil: He was in too deep!