Jay: [aside to camera] The Colombians' trip got canceled because a mudslide took out the runway at the local airport. That thing's made of dirt. Are we sure it didn't just rain?
Gloria: So we never left, and we could have gone to Phil and Claire's, but-
Jay: We decided to enjoy our own quiet, stress-free holiday dinner at home with no one the wiser.
Gloria: We're having a little steak-cation, only with turkey instead of the steak.
Jay: Stay-cation.
Gloria: What did I say?
Jay: "Steak-cation." It's stay-cation.
Gloria: Oh, so, this is how you want to start the quiet, stress-free dinner, with an English lesson? [speaking Spanish]
Jay: They call her "la tranquila."