Gloria: That can't be right. You have to check again.
Doctor: The tests are conclusive. Everything will be all right, Mr. Pritchett. Let's go.
Gloria: No, Jay! If that's true, then I'm the worst wife in the whole wide world! I made you suffer for two whole days!
Jay: Honey, it's okay.
Gloria: No, it's not okay! Why? Why do I always almost kill my husbands?
Jay: And I wanna hear this story sometime, but I'm sorta counting down to a rupture here!
Gloria: No! You can't go without forgiving me! What if you die in there? What do I do without you?
Jay: I forgive you! But nobody dies of an appendectomy.
Manny: True. It's usually the anesthesia that gets you. You're over 60, right?
Gloria: I will never forget you, Jay!
Jay: Could you go back to not caring, please?