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Quote from Phil in Strangers on a Treadmill

Phil: Good evening. I would not be here tonight if not for the hard work of the SCARB board of trustees...
[aside to camera:]
Phil: I didn't have my jokes. What choice does a guy have but to play it straight?
[back:]
Phil: The support of my family and Gil Thorpe's colon. [crowd laughs]
[aside to camera:]
Phil: But Phil Dunphy is no straight guy.

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