Dr. Perry: Well, based on your credit score, we'd like to welcome you to Sequoia Community College.
Luke: Oh, thank you!
Dr. Perry: And once your walk through one of our 15 TSA-approved metal detectors, anything is possible.
Luke: How hard is it?
Dr. Perry: Well, most of our students report about 10 to 15 hours of homework a week in addition to class time.
Luke: That sounds like real college.
Dr. Perry: This is a real college. And it's a lot of hard work. But, you put in your two years here, then transfer to a real- to a four-year college and you will land an entry-level job. Nothing too glamorous, but you pay your dues, climb the ladder. By the time you're 45, you're living in a three-bedroom house with a picket fence!
Luke: Wow!
[aside to camera:]
Luke: Three-bedroom house with a picket fence? Already got one of those. Plus, free meals, laundry, and cable. I am living the dream. You know what I say? "Whom needs college?"