Claire: What did I tell you what happened if you got him a gun? Deal with this!
Phil: Buddy, uncool.
Claire: That's it? No, no, no, no, no. The agreement was that if he shoots someone you shoot him.
Phil: We were serious about that?
Claire: Yes, we were and now you have to follow through.
Luke: I'm so sorry!
Claire: Liar. Go!
Phil: He's got a birthday party.
Alex: What's more important here, dad?
Claire: You can shoot him afterwards, he'll be home at two.
Phil: I can't shoot him at two, showing our house at two.
Alex: What about three?
Claire: No, he's at a soccer game at three, and then- Oh, we gotta leave for that dinner thing in five.
Phil: Yeah, I guess that works for me.
Claire: [writing] Shoot Luke.
Phil: Sorry dude, it's on the calendar.