Hal Quote #896
Quote from Hal in Cattle Court
Hal: Six, seven, eight. I win!
Dewey: Wow. I got to tell you, Dad, I really thought this was just going to be another one of your stupid, useless lessons, like the time you made us nurse that rabid squirrel back to health. But this one really worked. I can't believe it, but I really learned some valuable things about life and about how the world really works. Thank you.
Hal: That's loser talk!
Dewey: What?
Hal: I am living in Successful Estates while you are being buried in a piano box! [laughs] In your face, drug addict! Hotcha! I won! I won! Oh, yes, indeed, I won! [cheers] I won, I won, I won...
Malcolm in the Middle Quotes
‘Cattle Court’ Quotes
Quote from Hal
Lois: And we can all thank Reese for the wonderful dinner he brought home from work.
Hal: Oh, way to go, son. And someday, all that toner I keep bringing home will come in handy, too.
Quote from Dewey
Dewey: Six, seven, eight, nine, ten. I win. Wow, I smoked you again, Dad. Looks like I'm just better at Life than you.
Hal: Good for you, Dewey. But I hope you know that this isn't how things work in the real world. It's very oversimplified.
Dewey: Hmm.
Hal: I mean, you can't just break into a zoo, roll a couple of elevens and suddenly become the dean of a university.
Dewey: I did.
Hal: Son, I'm just trying to give you a life lesson here.
Dewey: Yet that's my orange limo sitting at the finish line, isn't it? Interesting.
Hal: [pretends to read card] "Dewey goes straight to bed with no dessert." Interesting.
Quote from Hal
Dewey: Dad? What's going on? I got your message at school. Is everything okay?
Hal: Everything's about to be. Have a seat.
Dewey: You pulled me out of a math test to play a game with you?
Hal: This is much more important than some useless math test. I have to make sure that you understand you got lucky last time. Life won't always go your way, Dewey. And the sooner you learn that lesson, the better. Sit down. Sit.
[later:]
Dewey: "You study hard and become an astronaut." All right.
Hal: What?! What?! What kind of lesson is this stupid game teaching you?! Where's the card that tells you your hemorrhoids are not covered by your health plan, huh?! Oh, would that not make a fun game?