Pastor Roy: Hal, I have to meet a parishioner in my office. Would you mind continuing the lesson?
Hal: What, me?
Pastor Roy: Don't worry. It's just the story of Daniel and the lions. I'm sure you know it in your sleep.
Hal: Uh... Okay, then, class. [clears throat] Uh... This is a story about a man named Daniel, and, apparently, some lions, so... Um "Uh, it-it pleased Darius to set over the kingdom 120 princes, which should be over the whole kingdom, and over these three officials, uh, uh, of whom Daniel was first"
Dewey: [raises hand] When do the lions show up?
Hal: Soon, Dewey. Please, you just have to be a little patient. [loses page in the bible] Ooh! Ooh! [closes book] "Uh, uh, and Darius said to Daniel, 'Yea, verily, I smote you, and I send thee to be thrown into the den.' Where soon, Daniel was eaten by the lions."
Girl: I thought God saved him.
Hal: Oh. Well, sure. [chuckles] I was getting to that. Uh, as, as it is written... the lion dith spit him up along with a lamb. A talking lamb.
[later:]
Hal: [loudly] "And verily, it came to pass, that the big lump in the middle of the boa constrictor turned out to be the missing ranger. Forasmuch as the multitudes could still hear his radio saying unto them, [imitates CB radio] 'Come in, Dave. Dave, do you read me?'