Barney Quote #1255
Quote from Barney in Subway Wars
Robin: So, is this ride your way of apologizing for this morning?
Barney: I'm sorry. I never apologize. And why would I?
Robin: Are you kidding me?
[flashback to Barney and Robin at MacLaren's:]
Robin: Hey, Barney, can I talk to you?
Barney: Sure. Stand a little more this way. I'm scouting some talent. Pretend we're talking about something important.
Robin: Oh, well, this... This is something important. Um, I'm having a... A really rough time at work. You know, the whole Becky thing...
Barney: Oh, you know what? That's just getting distracting. Um, say "carrots and peas". Carrots and peas. Carrots and peas. Carrots and peas. Carrots and peas.
How I Met Your Mother Quotes
‘Subway Wars’ Quotes
Quote from Marshall
Marshall: [inner monologue] I'll show them. My body can outrun any motorized vehicle. I'm like John Henry when he beat the steam engine. All I need is a great folk song.
Marshall: [singing] Gather round, ye children To hear the tale so sweet Of a man who dared to race machines With nothing but his feet
Marshall: Suck it, grand-butt!
Marshall: [singing] Marshall Versus the machines Hyah!
Quote from Lily
Conductor: [indistinct talk over muffled P.A.]
Lily: Track maintenance?
Conductor: [indistinct talk over muffled P.A.]
Lily: 20-minute delay?
Man: How do you do that?
Lily: I grew up here, I speak conductor. Damn it!
[Lily exits the train. The doors then close and the train starts moving.]
Lily: Damn it!
Quote from Barney
Barney: I cannot stop staring at that girl's face.
Ted: Face. Huh. That's your weirdest nickname for boobs yet.
Barney: No, Ted, I'm really looking at her face.
Lily: Aw... That's actually really sweet.
Barney: Puffy cheeks, smudged mascara, slightly red nose... That girl was just crying. She's so sad and defenseless. Anyone have a condom?
All: Oh! Oh, God! No, no, no!
Lily: That's it! You know what? Five-minute time-out! Corner booth! Now.