Ted Quote #750
Quote from Ted in Rabbit or Duck
Ted: It's a phone girl?
Marshall: I know, I know. No. But, no, then we met her. And, Ted, she's a world-class violinist. She's a gourmet cook. And she can quote every line from Caddyshack!
Ted: Wow.
[later, Ted arrives at the date:]
Natalia: Hello, Ted. "And what brings you to this nape of the woods? "Neck of the wape? Why are you here?"
Future Ted: [v.o.] So, we all had dinner. And, kids, Lily and Marshall's hard work had paid off, because that girl was terrific. In fact...
Marshall: Oh, but, Natalia, tell Ted the problem.
Lily: Yeah. Yeah. Tell him. Tell him.
Natalia: Well, unfortunately, I'm going to have to leave the country soon because my visa is about to expire.
Lily: [whispers] She needs to get married.
Marshall: Federal law expressly dictates that a foreign national can't maintain residency for longer than
six months without a work visa. Sorry.
Future Ted: [v.o.] But when it came down to it...
Waiter: And you, sir, the rabbit or the duck?
Ted: What?
Waiter: It's a prix fixe menu for Valentine's Day, and we're already out of the steak, fish and chicken. So, rabbit or duck?
Ted: Rabbit. Sorry, guys. I gotta go.
Marshall: Why would Ted order rabbit if he was just gonna run out?
How I Met Your Mother Quotes
‘Rabbit or Duck’ Quotes
Quote from Barney
Ted: What, you're actually gonna hook up with these girls that call you?
Barney: Oh, indubitably. I'm meeting the first one here any minute. Keep your eyes peeled for a red sweater. Based on her texts, she's dirty, dyslexic, and wants to 96 me. Semi-colon, end parentheses.
Quote from Barney
Barney: You guys remember Ranjit.
Ranjit: Hello.
Ted: Hey, Ranjit. Good to see you.
Barney: I've enlisted Ranjit's services as my personal driver because for the next week, I'll be sleeping with hundreds of women, and I don't wanna take the subway, 'cause, you know, germs.
Quote from Ted
Robin: I do not love Don.
Marshall: Robin, neurologically speaking, the part of the human brain that makes you hate people is located right next to the part of the brain that makes you wanna jump people's bones. The two responses are so similar it's hard to tell them apart.
Ted: You know what it's like? Wait, I have to get a book. Give me 30 seconds.
[Ted rushes out of MacLaren's. He returns 22 minutes later:]
Ted: Okay, this is fun. Look at this picture. It's a rabbit. You can look at it for hours and be absolutely sure it's a rabbit. But then one day, you look at it, and you realize, "Wait a second, it's a duck." It's a rabbit. It's a duck. Rabbit. Duck. Rabbit. Duck. Isn't this fun?
Future Ted: [v.o.] It sure was.