Ted Quote #118
Ted: You found me a match?
Bob Rorschach: There she is. Your soul mate. That'll be 500 bucks.
Ted: No way. The last time I did this, the girl turned out to be engaged.
Bob Rorschach: She's not engaged. She's your soul mate. Just read the file.
Future Ted: [v.o.] So I read the file. And by God, this woman was perfect. She liked dogs, she spent her summers in North Carolina, she played bass guitar, she did the Times crossword, she played tennis, she liked old movies, her favorite food was lasagna, her favorite book was Love in the Time of Cholera, her favorite singer was Otis Redding and she wanted two kids: a boy and a girl.
Ted: All right, fine. Set it up.
How I Met Your Mother Quotes
‘Milk’ Quotes
Quote from Barney
Barney: Uh, excuse me, has anyone ever told y... Oh, my God.
Woman: What?
Barney: Oh! Call an ambulance!
Woman: What's going on?
Barney: Try not to speak. Here, sit down. Just don't talk, don't talk.
Waitress: Is she okay?
Barney: I'm serious, call 911.
Woman: What's wrong? What's the matter?
Barney: Shh! Shh! Just don't move. Don't move. Just try... Here, have some water. Water! Here, drink this. Shh! Shh!
Robin: You know, the more I watch this, the less convinced I am that it's the greatest pickup line of all time.
Ted: Wait for it.
Quote from Marshall
Ted: All right, so, Barney, are you doing this or what?
Robin: Oh, geez, Barney, don't do this.
Barney: I have to, it's my birthday present to Ted.
Marshall: You don't have to. Please, it's going to be embarrassing and we're going to have to stop coming here, which will suck. In addition to probably being kind of healthy.
Ted: Come on, Marshall, it's the greatest pickup line of all time. Barney.
Marshall: Oy, gevalt.
Quote from Future Ted
Lily: 28. Two more 'til the big one, three-oh.
Future Ted: [v.o.] Actually, my 30th birthday wasn't so bad. Well, except for the goat in my bathroom. Which is a great story. But I'll get to that later.