Ted: Hi, Ellen. I think I want my money back.
Ellen: I'm a failure. I'm all washed up. I tried everything, Ted. I widened the search parameters. I tweaked the program. Last night, I stood out on the street for five hours showing your photo to random pedestrians, no takers. Although this transvestite hooker said he/she would do you for half price because you kinda look like John Cusack and his/her favorite movie was Say Anything.
Ted: Come on, Ellen, I mean, a pint of ice cream isn't that a bit cliché?
Ellen: It's for the bourbon.