Lily Quote #3
Marshall: So, did you kiss her?
Ted: No. The moment wasn't right. Look, this woman could be my future wife; I want our first kiss to be amazing.
Lily: Aw, Ted that's so sweet. So you chickened out like the little bitch.
Ted: What? I did not chicken out! You know what? I don't need to take first kiss advice from some pirate who hasn't been single since the first week of college.
Lily: Ted, anyone who's single would tell you the same thing. Even the dumbest single person alive, and if you don't believe me, call him.
[cut to Ted phoning Barney as he plays laser-tag]
How I Met Your Mother Quotes
‘Pilot’ Quotes
Quote from Barney
Barney: I see what this is about. Have you forgotten what I said to you the night we met?
[flashback:]
Barney: Ted, I'm going to teach you how to live. [off Ted's look] Barney, we met at the urinal.
Ted: Oh, right. Hi.
Barney: Lesson one, lose the goatee. It doesn't look good with your suit.
Ted: I'm not wearing a suit.
Barney: Lesson two, get a suit. Suits are cool. Exhibit A. Lesson three, don't even think about getting married till you're... thirty.
Quote from Barney
Lily: We're coming with you.
Ted: Barney?
Barney: Alright, but under one condition.
[cut to:]
Barney: Look at you, you beautiful bastard, you suited up! This is totally going in my blog!
Quote from Barney
Ted: Okay. Moment of truth. Wish me luck.
Barney: Ted's gonna get it on with a TV reporter. "This just in." Okay... [raises hand for a high-five]