Lily: So I was driving with my friend, who thinks he's the road-trip master. He has leather driving gloves. Who wears those?
The Mother: Huge dorks. That's who.
Future Ted: [v.o.] Your mother was lying. She had her own pair.
Lily: And he always makes us stop to see some weird roadside attraction no one except him gives a crap about.
The Mother: Nerd alert!
Future Ted: Kids, you remember the seven-hour detour on our trip to Disney World so your mother didn't miss
that goat in South Carolina who could blow smoke rings.
Lily: And he won't go one mile an hour over the speed limit.
The Mother: That would drive me crazy. I would give him a humiliating nickname until he stopped driving like a little girl.
Future Ted: It was Lady Tedwina Slowsby. And it worked.