Marshall: Hey, guys! Guess what this is!
Ted: One of your socks? Boom! You're huge.
Marshall: No, it's our unborn son's Christmas stocking. Grandma Gunderson started knitting it the day Lily and I got married. And she died before she could finish.
Ted: I miss stockings. My stepdad Clint made us get rid of anything that reminds him of the commercialization of Christmas.
Lily: I thought you said he dresses up as Santa.
Ted: Yeah, but, uh, to protest gender stereotypes, he plays Santa as a woman. Though, he keeps the beard. The result is disturbing.