Robin: We wouldn't even be talking about this if Marshall could read a magazine at work.
Lily: Oh, he's always been this way. Remember law school?
Marshall: Sure do.
[flashback to Lily crying on the sofa in the apartment as Marshall returns home]
Marshall: Baby, what is it?
Lily: [sobbing] The credit card bill came today. You checked into a hotel two blocks from school on a Tuesday.
Marshall: It's not what you think.
Lily: Who is she, Marshall? What's her name?
Marshall: Burrito. Carnitas Burrito.
[present:]
Robin: So, you checked into a hotel room just so you could read a magazine there?
Marshall: Hey, Robin, do you want me to see if the waitress has any giant sugar cubes for that high horse of yours? [high-fives Lily]